Drama Street Grand Central Station

Oh, ARRRRGGGGHHHHHH... I'm so over drama at the moment!!! I feel like wherever I am, it finds me. And no, before you think it, I'm not inviting it in!!!

I've been away for a delightful week in Sydney - to see the Royal Easter Show - for work of course - and I got to sit and paint for a couple of days - and that was just the release I needed. I started to feel in control again - and I haven't felt that way for over 2 months! I got to breathe out.

And, then, when I came home it all started again. I really don't understand how some people can think it's OK to behave the way they do - and THEN act like you shouldn't be offended/upset. Even when you've taken the time to explain to them that their action DO really upset you and WHY!

Maybe I'm too thin skinned - but these people have hides of a rhino! I have been trying so hard to be stronger and rise above it all. AND really trying hard to NOT spend all day everyday worrying and fretting about people who don't care about me. I don't have enough time in my day to do that. It's not working too well though - despite my really wanting it!

On a positive note, there are people in my life that surprise me in a very good way as well. I know that - and I need more of that. I need to be pumped up with some goodness juice so I'm fortified when those that think belittling and degrading your best efforts is a way to move forward. That when you put your hand up to volunteer to slog your guts out every other minute of your day that you're not working, that you automatically volunteer to cop abuse. I'm sorry, but that's not OK with me. It's never OK.

So, how do I stop feeling so damn upset? How do I stop myself from crying? How do I just switch off? How do I do the right thing by the people I'm responsible for? Sometimes it all feels just too hard to get it all right. Other times I'm just 'over it'.

Can I close my eyes and hope they go away?